Saturday, December 01, 2007

Wee bit of a basket case are ye then?

Well, here we are at 11:22 pm thinking I need to get to bed.

But I'm not ready yet.

It still feels like I am trying to exercise some odd feelings I can't quite identify.

I have been a basket case most of the day. I sat in the drama this afternoon and wept. Just wept.

I don't cry at dramas, ESPECIALLY Little Women.

Then tonight Lauralea and I watched a favourite movie, and I wept again.

Today I have been overwhelmed by love and emotion and it's all catching up with me I suppose.

Actually I think it's the week that has finally caught up with me. And I am undone.

I miss my dad. I miss my girls. I find it hard to let go of friends.

And Christmas is coming.

If I was a girl I could blame the calendar. But I am a guy, so it's probably my fault.

Not that I'm allotting blame, or accusing myself of anything other than being human.

But as you know, some nights it's just difficult being human.


It's an ok season to walk through. It'll get better I know.

But for tonight I feel, lost.

And it's ok feeling lost. I have the comfort of knowing that He knows where I am.

As long as somebody does. That way I can focus on the tears at hand.

If that makes any sense.


Nite.
Take care of yourselves.

5 comments:

  1. "But I am a guy, so it̢۪s probably my fault."

    This is one of my fundamental rules for living, but that's just normal.

    But about the weeping and emotion, we seem to be like that too. It's not a great place to be, but you just have to keep (gritted teeth) going sometimes.

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  2. For some reason, not sure why, I just want to say thanks to you. Maybe just for being sensitive and human and giving us permission to be human too.

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  3. Marc and I watched "It's a Wonderful Life" the other night and it really got to us. And just this morning Marc thanked me for putting up with him being so "emotional" (you know, crying and being affected by things) and I told him he was just being human. So there you go. It's hard to feel things, certainly, but I think it's good for the soul in the end. Take care of yourself, too. :)

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  4. There are empty places in our lives sometimes. You know, the spots that once our children took or our parents....people we love.

    It's really difficult wading through those moments in time.

    Thanks Randall, for sharing those inward thoughts with all of us. Being sensitive is good..........

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