Where am I?
I am behind in many things. It's the kind of behind that would make me anxiously fretfulÂ in college. Behind in myÂ filingÂ and emailing. Behind in my initial connections with people, behind in what I would call my secondary line of work. I am behind and when I get that way it's like high school math, it's just difficult to get caught up again.
I've been having some good one on ones with people and some of those primary line activities. There have recently been some desperate and difficult personal stories of people here in the field, and they've trusted me with their news and needs, so that's been good. But I often just notice the things I get behind with.
I've been thinking of my dad a lot lately. Actually my dad and grandparents who died a year before dad. Dreams have become vivid again, night and day dreams, and a part of me wonders and misses them. I wonder where is that picture I have of dad. It's still in a box someplace around here, and I search a bit till I tire of looking or I get distracted by some other thing.
That's new again. Thoughts of him, missing him, wondering what life might have been like if he could see and experience where we live now. He would have liked this place I think.
I discovered recently that when his parents and siblings moved to town from the country homestead, at the time they moved, he moved to attend High School & Bible school in Manitoba.
When my parents packed up their lives and moved to Ontario, on the day they moved I packed up and left for Bible school in Alberta.
And last Autumn, when Lauralea and I and Micah packed up and moved home, Thomas left for Bible School.
Three generations of families moving one way and their kids moving another.
Anyway, just been missing my dad lately, wondering who he has become.
Continuing to pray too. The prayers have been more work because there's more at stake in some of that work lately. For the kids, for individuals, for myself, some of the praying lately has needed to beÂ persistentÂ or ongoing, until there is peace again and there is a season of rest.
Yeah, just praying through this time for now.
So yeah, that's where I am. Feeling a bit of failure in the work, missing my dad a lot, and pushing through some difficult patches in prayer.
It's just a season, like winter, which should pass too one day.