Tuesday, September 19, 2006

On Call

So, instead of being at band practice tonight, or doing my homework, I ended up at the Hospital. I'm on call this week. "Pastor on Call."

He was 71, and he died tonight of liver cancer. His family gathered around him, weeping and looking lost. They called in a pastor because that's what you do after the person is gone, right?

I come and listen and think of helpful things to say. Small things mind you, and spoken at the right moment. I read a passage of scripture with them and pray with them, for them.

Usually there is allot of standing and listening involved. Funny thing tonight though. It was my first such work since dad died. Before he died I used to stand there quietly, listening, praying, and my thoughts would invariably turn to the day when I would be them, standing at the side of my dad's deathbed.

Today as I stood there, my thoughts didn't go there. Instead they rushed ahead to when it would be me in the bed. I am the next generation to line up at that crossroad, and follow the direction the roads I've chosen in this life have lead me.

What a new thought. I am next. There are no more.

Hmm.

6 comments:

  1. Randall, a friend of mine (same age, graduated same high school class) died in the past few weeks. I am no longer the upcoming generation. I think I have stepped into the current generation that has "dying on my mind".

    In the midst of this I have been re-energized to consider what I am doing and to push ahead on what I need to be doing. Not a bad result of facing death -- living life!!

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  2. Hi Ron,

    Yeah, I've been following the story over on your blog.

    That kind of a shock to the system makes a guy think through his choices very carefully.

    Hope you are doing ok down there in K town. I might try to look you up in a week or so.

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  3. I can understand to a degree Randall. Losing my last two grandparents this year along with my uncle with the healthiest lifestyle made my dad think of such things and I felt myself being pulled a step up from a grandson to a son. I'll only be 26 next month but age is so relative.

    At any rate, don't let it pull you down man. You're still a young guy with a long future!

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  4. I'm sorry. I'm trying to understand the "there are no more" statement. In my opinion, in your case you have 2 sons to continue on the legacy. Whereas someone who is alone, then there truly is "no more".

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  5. By the "No more" statement I meant more of the whole, "I don't have to worry about my own death because my grandpa has to die first, then my own dad will die etc..."

    It used to be a comfort to me that they were around and would "go first".

    Now I don't have that "Comfort," cause I am next, there are no more ahead of me to go.

    Sorry for taking you down the wrong road.

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  6. Following my dad's funeral, a month after my mom's funeral, my brother-in-law (the pastoral one) stated that, "we are now orphans". At first I thought it was odd to refer to a bunch of middle-aged people with families of their own as orphans, but as I continued to deal with the loss, the term became more significant. He went on to make a point about us needing to be intentional about being a family now that the glue of our parents was gone.
    I'll continue to pray for you and your family.
    And have sent a quick prayer for the family that you visited at the hospital ... may something you said, or your merely being there, have touched a heart.

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